Popish Priest

Is one that takes the same Course, that the Devil did in Paradise, he begins with the Woman. He Despises all other Fanatics as Upstarts, and values himself upon his Antiquity. He is a Man-Midwife to the Soul, and is all his Life-time in this World deluding it to the next. Christ made St. Peter a Fisher of Men ; but he believe it better to be a Fisher of Women, and so becomes a Woman’s Apostle. His Profession is to disguise himself, which he does in Sheeps-Cloathing, that is, a Lay Habit ; but whether, as a Wolf, a Thief or a Shepherd, is a great Question ; only this is certain, that he had rather hanv one Sheep out of another Man’s Fold, that two out of his own. He gathers his Church as Fantaics do, yet despises them for it, and keeps his Flock always in Hurdles, to be removed at his Pleasure ; and though their Souls be rotten or scabby with Hypocrisy, the Fleece is sure to be sound and orthodox. He tars their Consciences with Confession and Penance, but always keeps the Wool, that he pulls from the Sore, to himself. He never makes a Posclyte, but he converts
him to his very Shirt, and turns his Pockets into the Bargain ; for he does nothing unless his Purse prove a good Catholic. He never gets within a Family, but he gets on the Top of it, and governs all down to the Bottom of the Cellar–He will not tolerate the Scullion unless he be othrodox, nor allow of the turning of the Spit, but in ordine ad Spiritualia. His Dominion is not founded in Grace, but Sin ; for he keeps his Subjects in perfect Awe by being acquainted with their most sacred Iniquities, as Juvenal said of the Greeks.

By this means he holds Intelligence with their own Consciences against themselves, and keeps their very Thoughts in Slavery ; for Men commonly fear those that know any Evil of them, and out of Shame give Way to them. He is very cautious in venturing to attack any Man by Way of Conversion, whose Weakness he is not very well acquainted with ; and like the Fox, weighs his Goose, before he will venture to carry him over a River. He fights with the Devil at his own Weapons, and strives to get ground on him with Frauds and Lies–These he convers to pious Uses. He makes his Prayers (the proper Business of the Mind) a Kind of Manufacture, and vents them by Tale, rather than Weight ; and, while he is busied in numbering them, forgets their Sense and Meaning. He sets them up as Men do their Games at Picquet, for fear he should be misreckoned; but never minds whether he plays fair or not. He sells Indulgences, like Lockier’s
Pills, with Directions how they are to be taken. He is but a Copyholder of the Catholic Church, that claims by Custom. He believes that Pope’s
Chain is fastened to the Gates of Heaven, like King Harry’s in the Privy-Gallery.