Catholic

SAYs his Prayers often, but never prays, and worships the Cross more than Christ. He prefers his Church merely for the Antiquity of it, and cares not how sound or rotten it be, so it be but old. He takes a liking to it as some do to old Cheese, only for the blue Rottenness of it. If he had lived in the primitive Times he had never been a Christian; for the Antiquity of the Pagan and Jewish Religion would have had the same Power over him against the Christian, as the old Roman has against the modern Reformation. The weaker Vessel he is, the better and more zealous Member he always proves of his Church; for Religion, like Wine, is not so apt to leak in a leathern Boraccio as a great Cask, and is better preserved in a small Bottle stopped with a light Cork, than a vessel of greater Capacity, where the spirits being more and stronger are the more apt to fret. He allows of all holy Cheats, and in content to be deluded in a true, orthodox, and infallible Way. He believes the Pope
to be infallible, because he has deceived all the World, but was never deceived himself, which was grown so notorious, that nothing less than an Article of Faith in the Church would make a Plaster big enough for the sore. His Faith is too big for his Charity, and too unwieldy to work Miracles ; but is able to believe more than all the sainst in Heave ever made. He worships sainst in Effigie, as Dutchmen hand absent Malefactors ; and has so weak a Memory, that he is apt to forget his Patrons, unless their Pictures prevent him. He loves so see what he prays to, that he may not mistake one saint for another ; and his Beads and Crucifix are the Tools of his Devotion, without which it can do nothing. Nothing staggers his Faith of the Pope’s Infallibility so much, as that he did not make away the scriptures, when they were in his Power, rather than those that believed in them, which he knows not how to understand to be no Error. The less he understands of his Religion, the more violent he is in it, which, being the perpetual Condition of all those are deluded, is a
great Argument that he is mistaken. His Religion is of no Force without Ceremonies, like a Loadstone that draws a greater Weight through a Piece of Iron, than when it is naked of it self. His Prayers are a kind of Crambe that used to kill schoolmasters ; and he values them by Number, not Weight.